i dont understand

sometimes i wish i could just run away, run away from all my problems, instead of going back to my old ways. what good is it if i just keep going back. nothing ever gets better, i just keep fighting, fighting off that pain that i never dealt with. I dont know how to explain it. it has this tight grip on me. very tight. its invisible though. when im distracted im good, but when things get low and hard i go right back to you. but the truth is you never free me. you make me feel in more bondage than anything else. but you know i wonder what it will take to get rid of you. prayer? straight up disconnection. i hate feeling like all that i do isnt enough. its a fight, that i think im willing to do whatever it takes to win.

Transforming Summer

being able to sleep past 10am hanging out with the family, hearing, thanks Shelby you're the best being able to function and watch kids laugh and play, and laugh @ meet the browns, because mr. brown is funny.. and life well, i don't really know.. no summer school, :) grateful for that. mom hopefully getting a new job, the grace of God over me, rain storm to end the drought, wishing to work out, working like its going out of style, hanging out with kids under 5 every day paying off debt single and content. thirsty for the Lord Transforming Season

hopefully soon!

going on vacation today, but when i get back, i hope to start blogging! blessings